This time of year is full: full of meetings, conferences, Regional Assembly's, not to mention stewardship campaigns, Advent prep, budgeting, and all the family activities that go along with the Fall. I’m a highly sensitive person (HSP), which if you’ve not heard that term, you can learn more about that here. Suffice it to say this means that I’m more sensitive to sensory input and stimulation than the average person.

Now, this works in my favor in my work because I often pick up on subtle shifts in a person’s demeanor, and I’m able to make connections between that shift and feelings and context that people often miss. The downside is I’m easily tired and overwhelmed when there is a lot of sensory input or things to process. I also have a tendency to empathize too much and can take on other people's feelings and the weight of the world if I'm not careful.

When I figured this out about myself, I took a hard look at how I was living my life and had to make some hard decisions. The more people and responsibilities I added to my life, the less capacity I had, causing my margin for error to shrink to nothing. That's how I ended up burned out in 2021. One of the simple changes I made was to no longer watch the news. I shifted to receiving an email summary of the headlines in my email every day and on the days when I was feeling particularly tired or overwhelmed, I'd skip it. I also started taking more walks outside, drinking more water, and laying off the sugar. All that allowed me to balance my nervous system and manage all the various responsibilities in my life...most of the time.

With the election on the horizon, all the unsettling news about AI, and the very real effects of climate change (it was over 100 degrees on the California coast this weekend and the waves have been washing away the beaches with more to come), I feel myself getting tired more easily. I have noticed less capacity for the normal day-to-day activities involved with parenting three children, running a nonprofit, a private practice, and being a clergy spouse. I know I’m not the only person that is sensing the background buzz of stress that is pervasive in our society right now and this next month will likely amp up the intensity.

What do you do to manage intensity? Write me back, I'm a real live person and read all the email responses I receive. I'm always curious about how other people manage stress.

For me, I'm working on having grace for myself and those around me. I'm watching my caffeine intake, taking power naps, and building in margin between activities. I'm saying no to new things right now, and I’m collaborating with Dr. Rae Karim to offer a one hour wellness insight on November 5, two days after the elections here in the US. Dr. Rae is a Certified Grief Expert and is going to talk with us about what happens when leaders grieve. The focus of the session is all the ways that people grieve. We'll discuss what grief does to the body, mind, and spirit and why it’s so important for leaders to create spaces where they can process grief.

I learned the hard way how grief can overwhelm the system and wreak havoc on our lives, physical bodies, and the organizations we lead. My hope is this session will give you food for thought so you can avoid overwhelm.
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Join Dr. Rae and me at Restore Clergy's next Wellness Insight: What Happens When Leaders Grieve?

Take Care,

Kinsie

Rev. Kinsie M. Tate, LPCC

Founder and Executive Director

Restore Clergy