This is a space for clergy in need of support to do the work they are called to do. A place of rest and renewal, honesty and transparency. Subscribe to hear from our Founder, Rev. Kinsie M. Tate who is a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, Ordained Minister in the Christian Church (Disciples of Christ) and clergy spouse.
Going at it alone?
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Do you have friends? Like the kind of friends that you can ugly cry in front of or whine about how hard life is and know that they won't judge you the way you judge yourself when that happens? Someone other than you spouse or family? Not that spouses and family aren't important, but sometimes they are biased because they need you to be okay so they can feel okay and that keeps you from feeling truly understood and supported. A friend isn't usually your primary life partner and doesn't rely on you to meet their basic needs, so they're better able to listen without fear and tell you the hard truth without worrying you'll both crash out. The sad truth is that most pastors don't have friends like this. I read a Barna article on The Friendship Gap in Pastoral Life that came out in January of this year that said more than two in five pastors say they often feel isolated, and only one in three say they have anyone outside their church they can truly confide in about personal matters. I think most of us know that loneliness isn’t always about being alone. I know I've seen lots of commercials for depression meds talking about that, and maybe I just notice it because I'm a therapist, but clergy are surrounded by people frequently and are some of the loneliest individuals I know. For many pastors, it’s a deeper disconnect and they really struggle to open up and allow others to bear the burden for a while. “This is a red flag for long-term sustainability in leadership,” Barna CEO David Kinnaman notes. “Friendship, vulnerability, and spiritual direction aren’t luxuries—they’re lifelines.” We offer all 3 in our programs, especially the Restoration Fellowship. Friendship, vulnerability and spiritual growth take time and commitment. When the majority of your time is spent holding healthy boundaries with others because you are their pastor and need to honor the trust and power differential, it's really hard to shift and receive care and comfort. It's especially hard to find the energy to go out and develop those relationships, to do what often feels like dating but with friends. Come and connect with other clergy that get what it's like to serve, lead, and still try to be a whole, healthy, person. If you'd like to begin a journey of connection and community, join us for our next 1 hour Wellness Insight: Running on Empty: The Hidden Costs of Depletion in Ministry happening June 10, 2026 @ 10am PST/ 1pm EST. It's an hour of your time, you'll get a CEU for attending, and maybe find some community and connection that will grow into the kind of friendship we all need. You don't have to go at it alone. We are here to help.
Take Care, Rev. Kinsie M. Tate, LPCC Founder and Executive Director Restore Clergy |
Restore Clergy
This is a space for clergy in need of support to do the work they are called to do. A place of rest and renewal, honesty and transparency. Subscribe to hear from our Founder, Rev. Kinsie M. Tate who is a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, Ordained Minister in the Christian Church (Disciples of Christ) and clergy spouse.
I was having a conversation with a client about the idea of goodness. The word is so simple but it's a pretty complicated concept and highly subjective. Most of us have certain things that make us feel good and things that make us feel bad and we're often adept at making time for the latter and avoiding the former. The tricky part is that sometimes avoiding what makes you feel bad gives those things more power and reinforces the belief that deep down, you're not good and need to be fixed....
Crystal Cove Beach, Newport Coast California courtesy of Mat Mahaffey My older brother, sister, and their kids came to town for a visit last week and it was a wonderful time to connect with family and enjoy God's creation at the beach. It was a reminder of how blessed I am to live near such a beautiful place and to have family that loves me. It was also a reminder of how grounding, restorative, and healing connection is - connection with nature, loved ones, and God. Connection with others is...
Creating Culturally Responsive Faith Communities A Continuing Education Session with Rev. Tate and Rev. Carolina Fuentes, LCSW What does it actually mean for a congregation to be trauma informed? It's more than a phrase we borrow from the clinical world and tape onto our ministry language. It's a posture — a way of noticing pain, honoring history, and building spaces where people don't have to leave parts of themselves at the door to belong. In our upcoming continuing education session, Rev....